So... how are you?

The three words I dread to hear.
You mean apart from wanting to cease to exist? I suppose I'm fine.
Except for battling with my crippling mental health goes something like this...

I’m numb to everything but my anxiety and depression, that make me an imposter of who I think am. 

Awoken by my raised pulse, anxiety bludgeons my stomach each and every morning. Forcibly removing me from the sweet release of sleep. 

In my uncomfortable haze of realising I'm still alive, my eyes are pricked with tears. I can't help but weep at the thought of another day I must endure a painfully exhausting existence. And anticipate that every waking moment will be one of dread and despair.

I feel as though I'm sinking slowly. And if you dared look into my eyes I'd bring you down with me too.

I'm beginning to realise it hurts to exist. In every possible way imaginable. From the very crown of my head to the soles of my feet.

This is now life as I know it and I don’t remember what it means to be happy. Was it ever real? All I do is lament the happiness I know no more. And turn the pain into 'art', in the hope that it at least counts for something. 

That all this suffering isn’t for nothing.

the reading of my poem aloud, spoken word

^ A spoken word poem about mental health and how it feels to live with depression and anxiety. If you feel like you're struggling with your mental health please talk to someone and refer to the links provided below. Hope you can understand why I've been away for a while.

16 Little Things You Can Do For Someone With Anxiety

http://www.buzzfeed.com/florapaul/16-little-things-you-can-do-for-someone-with-anxiety?bffbdiy&utm_term=.hsyGrYRPx#.tfbR73KOZ

My Blogpost on 'Coping with Anxiety'

⁍  http://www.margaretbelle.co.uk/2016/04/coping-with-anxiety.html 

Mind 

⁍ http://www.mind.org.uk/

Samaritans

⁍ http://www.samaritans.org/

NHS

⁍ http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/Pages/mental-health-helplines.aspx

Zoe Sugg's Anxiety Q&A

⁍ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sjuk3WMZByo

Zoe Sugg: Dealing with Panic Attacks & Anxiety

⁍ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-iNOFD27G4

margaret belle

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